People Don't Know Shit

During the course of thr week, I spoke with several folks on the topic of my procedure.

The women I know all applauded me for taking the plunge, er, the cut. "The burden of birth control is always placed on the woman, and that's just not fair," said one mom I know. Honestly, for me it seemed like a no-brianer: The vasectomy was covered by my health insurance.

Some girls I know don't have health insurance (like the ones I work with in the business of catering who tend to be in college or right out of college) and have to pay a lot for pills. Or sponges. Or whatever their choice of contraception is.

Another girl of the collegiate co-worker variety even told me that most boys expect the girl to provide the condoms. "I mean they say shit like 'I'm not the one who is going to get pregnant'. Can you believe that?" Well, I am a man, and I know most men are pigs, so sure I can believe it but I don't expect co-ed cuties to accept. Sadly I'm told, most do.

The men I spoke with were mostly knuckleheads who didn't have a clue about the specifics of a vasectomy. One dude, after I told him I had one, looked at me like somebody died and put his arm around me in an act of consolement. "They didn't cut my balls off man," I said. "Just cut the swimmers off at the pass."

Another guy figured you'd never be able to ejaculate again, taking the old adage "shooting blanks" literally. Most men were generally scared by the topic and didn't won't to hear about any kind of sharp object getting near the family jewels.

I'm not surprised, and you know why ladies? Because most men are pussies. Especially when it comes to their cock/prostate/butthole area. Men could never handle laboring a child. I'm sorry but we just couldn't. Conversley, women can handle reproductive issues with alarming grace because since roughly the time of their first period they go to the OB/GYN and get their coochies inspected on a regular basis. Men don't have anything like this and I'm starting to think maybe we should. Maybe there'd be less colon and prostate cancer if guys where acustom to having their plumbing checked. Most of the time early detection is the best way to combat cancer.

But we're men, we'll never change.